5 Sex Tips From Porn Stars
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And the adult industry concurs. “Porn is not a how-to guide” urge porn stars Stoya and Dale Cooper. “All sex education can’t be thrown on porn…but at the same time, porn could play a bigger role — instead of just focusing on penetration” Cooper says.
Stoya adds, “Porn is bluntly superficial entertainment that caters to one of the most basic human desires. Pornography exists and is not going to go away anytime in the near future. I see it as neither inherently empowering nor disempowering. Showing up on set and doing my job is not an act of feminism…my politics and I are feminist… But my job is not.”
In her own words, Stoya states, “I use my body to make gender-binary-heterosexual-oriented pornography for a production company that aims to have as much mass appeal as possible”. In other words, porn is “just a job” for both Stoya and Cooper…however — it does make porn stars pretty much experts on the difference between sex and true intimacy.
1. Consent
“One of the most problematic things that porn doesn’t show, is what consent looks like and how important communicating is with your partner, before and during sex. It’s something that’s as important at-home, as it is while filming.
As performers, we’re usually handed a 20 page contract that says, ‘Here’s payment info. Here’s what you’re doing. Do you consent to this?’ many times. There are also constant check-ins between performers and directors, it’s really supposed to be an open dialogue.
Simply having a conversation about what sexual partners want and don’t want is the best way to increase desire and improve the scene. In my personal life, it’s the same case. There’s nothing that turns me on more than someone who asks me what I want.”
2. Don’t skip foreplay
“I’m a huge believer that foreplay can truly be better than sex. I also treat every interaction with my partner as foreplay.
From texting, to dinner, to how we speak and look at one another in public — every action forms a connection, and every action has the power to make the sex that much better.
Everything is foreplay — it’s really that simple. It’s also always a good idea to brush up on tips and techniques for mind-blowing foreplay — thank me later! :)”
“Most women can’t come from penetration alone, this is a myth. I repeat —
THIS. IS. A. MYTH.
Make sure to go down on your partner and get her off, she wants to cum as badly as you do. And if for some reason you bust too soon… come back and finish her off! No one likes to be blue-balled — especially not me! Try using a clitoral vibrator while you’re penetrating her too, I recommend the SKYN Vibes personal massager… I’m obsessed.”
4. Lube and wipes are your friends
“For anal, we usually use SKYN All Night Long Lubricant or organic coconut oil*…and intimate cleansing wipes are a game-changer”
5. Be safe, get tested!
“Using protection, getting tested and wearing condoms is essential for porn stars. It’s something the industry as a whole does amazingly well, and I think it’s something we could really educate more people about—it’s so important. Incredible sex is always safe sex.”
*Using coconut oil as lubricant is damaging to condoms.
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